Health Organization for Pudendal Education

Hi Chlo,

Hope you don't mind me butting in here but I just wanted to say what I would do in your situation - when I go to the pain consultant, I would just explain the pain, and if he/she asks how it started I would tell him/her it started after sex. I really doubt he would say "but I thought it was due to a fall" - most doctors don't have time to remember anything about us poor patients, anyway. If he did say that, I think he would understand if you say you didn't feel comfortable sharing that at first, but now you are more comfortable sharing that now that you've had time to get used to this situation. I wouldn't fault anyone for not sharing such sensitive info. Also, since you say the first twinge of pain was a spasm, I think it sounds like it is spasmed muscles, and a physiotherapist would really help relax the spasms by doing internal therapy. Also, even though it's true that a lot of people have sex without ending up in pain, we are all built differently, and I've always had issues because of my very "small" anatomy, and I can't have a sex partner who is too large - sorry if that is TMI. Good luck!! I think you will get better with the physiotherapy

Hi Chloe

I have written to you before but haven't been posting on here for a while. I am in the UK like you are. My advice is to try and park all the guilt and just concentrate on your appointment with the Pain Consultant and note down all that is said on paper.

Pain Consultants IMHO are interested in methods of controlling your pain using drugs they are often anaesthestists as well. I told a pain consultant that i had rubbed my vulva which caused the nerves to be irritated and all he said was 'that doesn't happen to me if i rub my arm'. So they won't understand that aspect anyway ! It is not their specialism.

As for your record of saying anything about a fall they may not have it on their records in the clinic anyway so don't worry. If they do i would just explain that you were embarassed to say what had really happened and move swiftly on to sorting out the pain aspect. We all know it is not easy talking about this intimate area. I have found it difficult to speak of to others when really it is just another part of your body like any other.

I was given Nortriptyline and Gabapentin to control the pain. I was gradually given up to high levels of Gabapentin to see if it stopped any pain and then had to titrate down off it to a point where the pain was being controlled. It is all a balancing act and more or less up to you to find the balance of drugs that work for you.

I also had a transvaginal nerve block done which in my case irritated the nerves more and everything swelled up for a while - i don't recommend it.

I wasn't given any opiates due to causing constipation. I have only ever had Tramadol from my doctor to help with occasional very bad pain.

Having said all this to you i chose to come off all the drugs because of the side effects and my pain not really being controlled anyway. I have been off them for just over a year now. I still have burning and spiking pain every day but have learnt to accept it more and am beginning to find peace with myself.

I only look at this forum very occasionally now and just wanted to try and help you Chloe but i won't be posting again. I hope that your appointment in March goes well and that you get some answers that help you. I am over 60 and post menopausal and lack of oestrogen hormone doesn't help my case but i feel that you have a good chance to recover at your age.

Take Care

Rosemary X