My poor beloved Dottie

[Christopher]

I lost my beloved dog today, due to this horrible condition. Utterly heartbreaking. She currently at the pound, waiting to be put to sleep. My heart is sobbing.

I have been having major problems with an unstable pelvis since August. Every month I have worsened even while trying everything I could, including 3 sessions of prolo.

On December 1st I felt something slip in my sacrum and low back.

From that point on I have been essentially bedridden.

I was so wrapped in pain that I turned over the feeding n walking of Dottie to my daughter.
And over the last few days Dottie begin losing it. My daighter was not giving Dot the love n attention I always did. Dottie finally couldn't take it any more.

She began peeing n pooping on the floor over and over.

My wife moved her out of my bedroom and into aYn empty laundry room. She began to wail and cry. And I could do nothing unless I wanted to cause myself huge pain level increases.

In retrospect I wish I had said to hell with the pain and gone out and sat with her. But to my eternal shame, I did not.

Today my wife sent Dottie to the pound after the poor thing had covered the floor with poop.

She will not be placed is what they told us. That means she will be killed. And she is alone. Where is her daddy? Why won't he come for me?

Heartbreaking and all because is this curse of a condition.

I hope she will be waiting for me at the Rainbow Bridge.

I loved her so. Why was I so selfish? I could have spent more time with her in Dec, but no, I was too wrapped up in my pain.

Oh, Dottie.

I am so sorry.

Pudendal neuralgia and sacroiliac joint dysfunction together are such a terrible two.

[Christopher]

Sorry to have invites u guys to my pity party here.  I am doing a lot better today.  Still grieving, but better.

Chris

[Karyn]

Hi Chris,
I'm glad you checked back in with us. I'm truly sorry to hear about Dottie. I know how much she means to you.

She will not be placed is what they told us.

Today my wife sent Dottie to the pound after the poor thing had covered the floor with poop.

I don't understand why Dottie can't be adopted out. Is it because she has accidents in the house?

So, I was wondering if it would be possible for you to call the pound and maybe explain to them that Dottie is having accidents because of anxiety issues? Some times, our fuzz butts will act out when their routines have become disrupted. This is a behavioral issue, which can be corrected with love and patience.
Another suggestion is to contact your brother or sister. I know you'd still miss not having Dottie with you, but at least you would have the comfort of knowing she's being well taken care of.
My final suggestion is to contact a local no-kill shelter and have her moved. Chris, I really don't understand how your wife could just drop her off somewhere, knowing it's a good possibility that she'll be terminated.

loved her so. Why was I so selfish? I could have spent more time with her in Dec, but no, I was too wrapped up in my pain.

Here's your chance to redeem yourself, Chris, and help Dottie out at the same time.
Warm regards,
Karyn

[calluna]

I agree with what Karyn says, I too am so sorry to hear about Dottie and I hope it is not too late for something to be done to retrieve this situation.

If it is possible, I would suggest that Dottie first be checked over by the vet - there are lots of things that could cause her to become incontinent, and many of them are easily treated. For instance she could have a water infection - or she could have blocked or infected anal glands, either of these can cause a dog to become incontinent. And if her incontinence is because of anxiety, that too can be helped.

Over here there are charitable organisations that deal with rescue and re-homing, and that do not have dogs put to sleep. In fact I've just had to help with a situation like this myself, where a relative was too unwell to continue caring for their dog. It was very difficult for all of us, but we know that the dog is now happy and well looked after in his new home. Perhaps you could consider something like this?

I do hope that it is not too late for Dottie.

[Christopher]

Thanks for your kindness. Its too late, tho. Once you sign the papers its done deal. You cannot get a dog back.

Dottie essenti ally had a nervous breakdown. She felt the horrible anxiety in the house and suffered because I wasn't there for her. It could have beeen health-related. I don't know.

But she went off the deep end and was no longer house broken. At the age of 10 and with ppotential health issues, they don't even try.

The problem was the suddenness of her decline. It happened over the course of aboout 2 days. We had other plans to deal with finding her a new home, but at the end it got so bad my wife simply couldn't tolerate dealing w dottie. The level of addition stress was too much. My wife has her own anxiety issues, especially around feces.She is being pushed to the brink on a daily basis dealing with my health.

I could have possibly forestalled it bygiving dot more attention. But I was so wrapped up in my own pain I didn't notice dot's until it was too late. I have never regretted my behaavior so much in this whole lifetime.

Chris

I failed her by being so narcissistic. I am sure she forgives me. I just have to forgive myself. That is mire difficult.

[Violet M]

Dear Christopher,

I'm so sorry about the loss of your little friend but I've no doubt you will see her someday at the Rainbow Bridge. If she could talk to you right now I'm sure she would assure you that none of this was your fault and to please not blame yourself. She would understand that you already have more than you can handle right now fighting PNE.

As long as I've known you on the forums I never would have characterized you as someone who is narcissistic. Instead I would have thought of you as someone who is embattled with a painful illness who is just trying to get through it the best you can while helping others on the forum. I pray that over time your heart will heal from the loss of Dottie.

Hugs,

Violet M

[Amanda]

Hi Christopher

I really feel for you right now and hope that you can have happy memories of your precious Dottie.
I lost my darling dog in August, he was 17 years old and my treasure, he was always aware when I felt unwell looking longingly at me when i lay in bed in agony.
I cant imagine how you feel but can only wish that you can know that you did your best for your lovely pet....there is only so much we can do when wracked in pain...please dont feel too guilty as you need to concentrate on your well being right now. There is no point in thinking what if etc....remember the nicer times with your pet and those times when they were receptive of your affections.
With PN we cant stretch to everything...no matter how hard we try!

[jacko]

Hi,
Really sorry to hear about your situation. I know very well how much time and attention a dog needs and in your circumstance it would have been so difficult to deal with.

Im sure that over the years you were a loving owner to dottie and gave her a great life when you could look after her.

I can understand your sadness but you did what you had to do realistcly so dont be too hard on yourself.

I really hope you find some way to improve your condition and remember you have lots of support on this forum.

Regards


Jacko

[BEEZIE]

Very sorry for your loss and your situation. You gave Dottie a long and happy life. She was very fortunate. I think that losing our beloved pets is in many ways more difficult than losing people. I lost my two elder cats last year and I'm still not over it. Do yourself a favor and focus on the good times you had.

Get well.

Beezie

[birdlife]

Chris, you shouldn't beat yourself up. I'm so sorry for you and your wife in this situation. You both had issues that meant just for once you had to put yourselves first for a little while. And it does sound as though Dottie had her own separate health issues going on too. In a perfect world you would have been up and about to see to Dottie, in a perfect world your wife would have seen to her. But you were in constant pain. Your poor wife was stressed to the brink already, and if she had had a breakdown who would have looked after either you or her. As Beezie says, "losing pets is in many ways more difficult than losing people", and half of that is because we aren't able to EXPLAIN to our animals. We make our decisions for the best at the time, its all we can do.
I'm having my own guilt trip right now, my little cat Tia died last week and I keep going over and over how I should have done this or that. I stressed that I should have taken her to the vet sooner, then I stressed that I shouldn't have taken her at all because of the way she was handled once there. Dottie thankfully didn't go through what Tia endured and had a peaceful ending. Please let that help to heal you, its the only way to be.
Take care